Christmas Cookies and Chaos
by Canadian-Parade
Summary: It's Christmas and Alfred can think of nothing better to do to get into the spirit than bake christmas cookies with Arthur. This is Arthur were talking about, so you can probably see where this is going to end. Just a little Christmas one shot.


The fire alarm blared and the smell of sugar and smoke filled his nose. Arthur was running back and forth behind him between the oven and the front door trying to get the smoke out. This was their fourth attempt at baking christmas cookies and from the look of still smoking oven, also their last.

"Bloody hell Alfred will you help me." Arthur dumped a bowl of water into the oven and more smoke billowed out. Alfred groaned and went to open another window.

_Why did I think that this good idea?_

"We should do something. I know, lets make a snowman. Or have snowball fight. Or find some reindeer."

Alfred beamed at his friend, his bright blue eyes shining with excitement. He was lounging on Arthurs couch trying to come up with something festive to do. Arthur was sitting opposite him on an old armchair with a book wondering how on earth his annoyingly eager friend had managed to get into his house again.

"No." Arthur replied flatly.

"But it's Christmas." Alfred whined. "Please."

"Alfred I said no." Arthur held his book up in front of his face. Alfred huffed and scowled. Then he had an idea.

"Let's bake Christmas cookies!"

Arthur perked up at the idea. "That depends." He said, lowering his book. "Are you actually going to let me bake them this time or are you going to eat the cookie dough before I have the chance." Alfred scoffed.

"Come on dude, I've never done that."

Arthur raised an eyebrow. Alfred waved his hand dismissively.

"Anyways, lets do it dude." Arthur sighed and set his book down. "Fine." Alfred cheered and ran into the kitchen with Arthur at his heels. Though he acted like he didn't want to, Alfred knew that his friend loved anything to do with cooking or baking. Alfred rummaged through the cupboards and pulled out an old recipe book with candycane shaped cookies on the front. He flipped open the book and flew through the pages.

"Lets use this one." He said, holding the book up and pointing to a sugar cookie recipe. Arthur grinned, despite himself.

"Alright, you grab the sugar, the flour and the butter. I'll get everything else." Arthur went into the pantry and Alfred opened up the closest cupboard. A rack of spices started down at him as he scanned them for the salt.

_Oregano, cinnamon, ginger, but no salt. We don't need salt anyway_. Alfred decided and opened the next cupboard. Spotting the vanilla right away he swiped it. Glancing back at the recipe, he began looking for the bowls.

"Arthur dude," Alfred said after closing the draw he had finished rummaging through. "Where are the bowls?"

"I've already got two out." Alfred turned and saw that Arthur had already started mixing the ingredients.

He practically bounced over to the where his friend was mixing the flour, sugar and butter together. It didn't look like cookie batter usually did at that stage but Alfred didn't comment. Arthur wasn't exactly known for his cooking skills after all.

"What can I do?" He asked, setting down the ingredients he had gathered. "You can add the eggs." Arthur said handing him one. Alfred smiled as he felt its smooth, cool, surface. Then he smashed it against the edge of the bowl as hard as he could. It broke immediately and egg went flying.

"Oops." Alfred said, yolk dripping down his cheek. Arthur growled and when Alfred looked at him he burst out laughing. Slimy egg was running down his friends face as well as in his hair. After a moment Arthur couldn't help but join in and the two laughed as they cleaned themselves up.

"Now." Arthur said, gingerly handing Alfred a fresh egg. "Try and do a little gentler." Alfred nodded vigorously. This time merely tapped the egg. It clinked again the egg stained glass but only a tiny sliver of a crack appeared. He did it again but a little harder and again it only produced a little crack.

He continued this until finely Arthur grabbed it and crushed it in his hands. Egg ran down his wrist and through his fingers into the bowl. Alfred scowled.

"That was my thing." He sulked. Arthur rolled his eyes as he washed his hands again.

"Well you can stir it." Alfred broke into a grin and immediately grabbed a large wooden spoon. It was clear that the spoon had seen better days, both the ends were blacked and there were little chips in the wood.

He stirred it so viciously it looked like the mix had somehow wronged him and he was taking it very personally. Little globs of half mixed flour and egg flew out of the bowl, landing on both the counter and Alfred. Arthur grabbed his friends shoulder and Alfred spun around so suddenly that the batter coated spoon smacked him in the face.

"Bloody hell!" He exclaimed, rubbing the batter off of his face and out of one of his eyes. Alfred set down the spoon and smiled sheepishly.

"Oops." He said again. Arthur just scowled at him.

Thankfully the rest of the process went rather smoothly. There were no more flying batter and no more cussing, at least until they came out of the oven.

The timer dinged after fifteen minutes and the two boys raced into the kitchen. Arthur slipped on his oven mitts and opened the oven door. He was completely expecting smoke to come rolling out but he was pleasantly surprised when nothing but the sweet aroma of sugar cookies came out. As soon as the cookies were onto the cooling rack Alfred reached for one.

"Ow, they're hot." He exclaimed, blowing on his fingers.

"They just came out of the oven of course they're hot." Arthur rolled his eyes. Alfred pouted and continued to blow. Then minutes later they were cooled.

"Alright I think they're good." Arthur said. Alfred beaming and wasted no time snatching up a cookie. He took a huge bite and almost instantly spit it out. It tasted like a salt block had exploded in his mouth. Alfred coughed and ran to the sink for water, hoping to wash the horrid taste out of his mouth.

"What the hell are you doing?" Arthur shouted. Alfred gulped down a glass of water and as he filled up a second one said, "Dude, those things are disgusting!"

He took another large sip of his water and Arthur grabbed himself a cookie. He took a bite of it and, like Alfred predicted, spit it into the nearest garbage can.

"How did that happen." Arthur scowled, and gulped down his own water before replying,

"Why do you think it was something I did?"

Alfred shot him a disbelieving look.

"Dude, you're the guy who burned cereal."

"It wasn't burned-" Arthur started. "Twice." Alfred interrupted. Arthur scoffed but didn't reply. When the burning sensation was mostly gone Alfred went to inspect what Arthur had added to their cookies. When he realized what went wrong he couldn't help but laugh.

"What are you laughing at you git."

"You added salt instead of sugar." Alfred spit out between laughter.

"What the- Let me see that." Arthur snatched the bag away and saw that it was indeed salt.

"Who buys giant bags of salt?" Alfred snickered. Arthur smacked him upside the head. "Ow." Alfred whined, rubbing the back of his head. Arthur smirked.

He set down the salt and went back into the pantry. He emerged with a different bag, light blue and definitely sugar. Alfred grabbed another egg and the two started making another bowl of batter. This time time, the only complication was when Arthur almost add soy sauce instead of vanilla. They sat in the living room, waiting for the timer for the second time.

_Beep Beep Beep_

Alfred jumped up and ran to the oven. Unsure of which button to push, he went with the thoughtful and well informed decision and pressed them all. The screen flashed the words _ERROR ERROR_ and he jumped back. The beeping stopped. Arthur came in with his floral pattern oven mitts on and took out their second attempt at a holiday treat.

"Woah, those don't even look like cookies." Said Alfred. And they didn't, they looked more like lumps of raw cookie dough.

"How the hell did that happen?" Arthur exclaimed.

"Maybe they still taste good." Alfred offered. He grabbed a one of the lumps and noticed how hard they were. Alfred hesitantly sunk his teeth into it- or at least he tried to.

"It's as hard as a rock." He grimaced and Arthur groaned.

"Lets try one more time." Alfred said.

"If we keep this up we'll burn down the bloody kitchen." Arthur replied with a hint of exasperation.

"Oh please." Alfred begged. Rolling his eyes Arthur went to grab another egg. They mixed everything up and before Arthur set the timer again he said, "We'll just bake these longer."

Thirty minutes later, smoke was billowing out of the oven. Alfred took out the black, crispy things that were supposed to be cookies. Arthur was running around behind him, frantically waving his arms and a tea towel. Alfred ran to the sink and filled up a bowl with water. He ran to the oven and threw it in. The water hissed as it touched the flames and scalding metal.

He ran back to the sink and did it again. After a few minutes the smoke alarm went silent and the kitchen was smoke free. Alfred leaned against the counter and wiped his forehead.

"Wow." He said. Then he straightened out and went to the fridge.

"What are you doing?" Arthur asked after taking a gulp of cool water.

"Getting another egg." Alfred replied. Arthur shook his head in disbelief.

"Alfred."

"Yeah?"

"Get out."

The next afternoon Alfred knocked at his friends door. Arthur opened the door and Alfred shoved something towards him.

"What is it?" He asked.

"Mattie and I made them this morning." Alfred smiled and gestured for Arthur to take to take the cookie. Arthur glared at him. He grabbed one and shut the door. Alfred smiled when he heard his friend mutter ruefully from the other side of the door,

"These things are delicious."


End file.
